College Freedom

I have officially started college, well not classes but living the life. So far my favorite day has been Sunday, a day jam-packed with worship. I attend the URC and in the evening attended the all- campus Praise & Worship where the whole auditorium was full of people, all unique, all different, yet with one thread in common : we serve the LORD. We sang together, we knelt in prayer together, we embraced and got to kow eachother a bit better. It seems all my insecurities that popped into my head as we drove up were washed away and replaced with joy and peace, and a desire to stay living in this way. It's amazing how for a long time I was excited about the freedom that College would bring -life on my own, no parental supervision, etc. And then the Pastor at Church put it into perspective for me quoting
           "Freedom is best when the boundaries are well-defined"

He then went on the give an illutration of a fish in a tank wanting freedom from the walls around him, but when he got out he died; 'freedom' killed him. It is the same way with us, when we try to free ourselves from God's rules we die to sin and lose our true liberty.

"The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to set the oppressed free,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor."

A Graduation Poem

In just a few short days I will be graduating, and decided to write a poem. See, people ask all the time about how excited I am, what my plans are, etc. But this is one of those times when I don't know what to expect...it may be liberating to graduate but it may also be a leap out of my comfort zone, and all I have ever known. I will be going to university more than a thousand kilometres away from home and my emotions flip-flop from being excited to live on my own and make my own decisions to anxiety about not having friends and family (who have given my so much encouragement and support) close by. Recently my Admissions Counsellor sent me an encouraging e-mail...and I was reminded of  Joshua when he was called to go far away...(see verses after poem)...

At Any rate....here is the poem I wrote :)

The end, marked by a date...
many people cannot wait,
I know not yet what to think
of the past that flew by in a wink
of the future that eagerly awaits
or the master plan that God holds safe.

Someday I can look back
and remember with a laugh
the many trials I thought mattered
that now have faded and shown
that God knows what is best
and His plan always has success

For now I am uncertain
of what lies behind the curtain
of the future; but I have faith
that God will be there always
no matter where I go

Joshua 1:7-9
 ⁷ "Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. ⁸ Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. ⁹ Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

Reflection of a courthouse visit

*a reflection I wrote after a class visit to the London Courthouse back in April....the man was released and all charges were dropped

“I was in prison and you visited me...” Well, actually you were in court and I was just on an educational trip with my law class so it was more watching than visiting. With eager eyes and listening ears we walked into the building eyeing the weapons in the belts of the security people as we passed by. A sort of majestic feeling passed through me as we entered the federal courtroom on the twelfth floor complete with a large coat of arms at the font of the room. Honi soit qui mal y pense… “Spurned be the one who evil thinks” written on it and here we were in a room where good versus evil fought (or rather Regina versus the accused). Later, in the same room, built to accommodate a large number of lawyers for the trial of the notorious biker gang the ‘Bandidos’ a case involving an ‘H group’ member was tried. The H group members are “slaves” to the Hell’s Angels, another notorious biker gang. As the man who I dubbed ‘Tattoo man’ was questioned I started to piece together the facts of the case, not unlike the investigators would have had to do. At first impression the case was simple: Tattoo man had been apprenticing at Tattoo World, a business next to the police station, and after a certain Agent Bradford had followed him around for several days a drug bust had been organized on the business. Instant success as the officers found cocaine in a basement furnace room and lidocaine* in a coffeepot, also found were some personal belongings such as a letter addressed to Tattoo man as well as his drivers license. Obviously Tattoo man was guilty; the cocaine must have been his and he was using Tattoo World as his FOB (forward operating base) while having all legal authorities believe he lived at his mailing address he was actually living in the basement of Tattoo World, dealing in coke acting as a the middle man for Hell’s Angels who had painted the basement door red (the official colour of their gang). Case closed…at least in my mind at first. But wait…the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms deems people innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. So, I fought to follow Tattoo man’s defence. Tattoo man had not been caught in possession of cocaine, and his knowledge of lidocaine was not illegal, lidocaine is not even a controlled substance. No one had any proof that Tattoo man knew about the cocaine in the basement, he only came there for bathroom breaks and the occasional party. Perhaps the only reason Tattoo man was even being ‘blamed’ for this was because of all his previous convictions which the crown prosecutor said “prove a total disrespect for the law”. “I wouldn’t say that.” was Tattoo man’s dismayed reply. After no further questions, and a long recess from court our class was left to wonder what would become of Tattoo man. I wonder if he was innocent. Mr. Allister, our guide even said it…some of the people in the crowded downstairs prison are probably innocent, but still are treated the same as the real criminal offenders until they are tried and proved innocent. I couldn’t help but wonder how our justice system compares with that of Jesus’ day so many years ago. He was tried in a trial where no one spoke in His defence, the looks on the faces of those who were present probably condemning Jesus with blatant hatred. There was no ‘innocent until proven guilty’ rule as Jesus stood before the Sanhedrin, in fact Pilot declared Jesus innocent yet Jesus was still flogged, hung on the cross, and mocked with intense hatred and evil thoughts. Words from Matthew 25:40 race through my head as I think of how Jesus compares himself with the least of these… “Truly, I tell you whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine you did for me.” The ‘scum of the earth’ those nasty creepy criminals who cover their bodies in tattoos and poison their systems with drugs…these people too are created in God’s image and were created for His glory. “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10). They too need to hear the gospel and repent of their evil deeds. “He who is stealing must steal no longer…” (Ephesians 4:28a). Instead of accusing and judging we ought to be loving and share the good news of salvation…prison is a great place to start especially when we remember that we would be in the same place were it not for the grace of God.                                                                                                                            

^{*lidocaine is often used to dilute cocaine when it is cut because cocaine numbs the gums and lidocaine has a stronger numbing effect as an anaesthetic so users are duped into believing the diluted version is stronger than it really is}

Colours

Another random poem I wrote last year...

there are lines everywhere;

differences that make people stare...

an obvious gap in the human race

and based on what?

ethnicity, culture, color

when will people learn

that God made uniqueness?

when will they see past

deep human weakness?

If love is blind why don't we all

stumble around, and fall?

Some accuse others of being racist

when they themselves are the first

to judge, to ignore, to exclude

when will they learn

that God loves all children?

when will they see past

the outside, and find beauty within them?

never in a fallen world

where children die and parents leave

until we live in God's land of perfection

if to His promises we cleave

now waiting for the better day

please do not just walk away

change,  act, love

Solitary Sleep

I wrote this poem last year sometime...and was kinda feeling sleepy and blue so I thought I'd post it

 

 

She sits alone

in dark and cold

tired, sad, broken.

The sickness that

consumes her, leaves

her with nothing.

Nothing would be better

than to simply live again.

Her mind is filled with nothingness

as she sleeps for hours on end.

She tries to wake her foggy mind:

no, her eyelids are too heavy

and so, all friends abandoned her...

said, "Come back when you're ready".

Slowly, slowly her eyes fall open

but pounding pain disturbs her brain...

a teardrop rolls slowly down her cheek

followed by many more, and sobs that have her weak.

The solitude of her painful existence

leaves her wishing to again feel nothing...

so off she drifts; alone again...

no longer remembered by even one man

to lonely, empty, sleep.

(*this poem is not meant to be analyzed...it's meant to stir emotion)

kinda hits home...Isn't it Funny

Funny how a $20.00 bill looks so big when you take it to church, but so small when you take it to the mall.

Funny how big an hour serving God looks and how small 60 minutes are when spent watching television, playing sports, sleeping or taking a lunch break.

Funny how long a couple of hours spent at church are but how short they are when watching a good movie.

Funny how we get thrilled when a football game goes into overtime, but we complain when a sermon is longer than the regular time.

Funny how small our sins seem, but how big their sins are.

Funny how we demand justice for others, but expect mercy from God.

Funny how when something goes wrong, we cry, "Lord, why me?" but when something goes right, we think, "Hey, it must be me!"



...Or wait...maybe all this isn't so "funny" after all. (Author unknown)

God is not a microwave

"God is not a Microwave"...that's what my friend told me...and it's true!

So often I wish, like the Pure NRG song Someday says "If it was up to me my life would be a blueprint on the table...and every year would have a label.." I've wondered lately about God's plan for my life...it seems like every time I think I have everything figured out God tweaks things a bit. It's hard to follow through with the verses that say to 'wait for the Lord'. But that little statement "God is not a microwave" show how impatient I (and many other people in this culture) have become. We expect to put a prayer in punch in a few numbers and pull out the answer we wanted..at just the right temperature too! But God is not like that...as hard as it is to remember it may take years for God to answer a prayer or reveal what He is doing in your life...and even then He may not answer the way we want Him to.

After all that ranting, and as much as it sometimes worries me...God does know best! He may withhold something 'good' from us so that we can have something much better later on! I suppose I'll just have to trust and pray...and delight myself in how awesome and holy God is...He knows what is best! Honestly, a gourmet meal that took hours to cook is worth the wait compared to a quickly heated and eaten hot-dog.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

ps. I don't know if my friend wants to be named on here so I'll give the credit to Lima echo echo Alpha november november :)